wldnt say it's anything too fancy but i think they'll look alright at the buffet line. just need to stick on the lil gadget that mom got me...so tt we can hopefully stick it into the chaffing dish. gonna complete tt tomorrow...
not sure if i'm back on the road again but am missing the boy terribly. *sigh* ok...need to go sleep it off. am getting a breakout soon...and it's not the best time for it.
- Mood:
calm - Music:Avalon - My Jesus, I love Thee
right...enough about the dampening part of weddings. so euphie being the sucker for the so-called fuss free and relaxed weddings...decided that we'll only be doing ONE for my dear friends this year together with the ROM and it shall NOT be one of those stuffy sit-down in function room and see couple cut cake, pour champagne type of wedding. i think somehow...working in a hotel kills ALL interest in having a hotel wedding banquet.
anw. so this whole thing is supposed to be...simple and plannable (is there even such a word?) in like 5 minutes. yes, it would have been if not because of euphie...who then again decided that things have to be pretty! *sigh* so since last year...when i asked around for possible places to hold my sister's wedding...and my colleague paul recommended fairy point, cy and i had our eyes fixed on the place. BUT being a government chalet...we cld only bk 3 mths BUT we were still not fast enough. this translates to...c/i at 3pm on actual day, with only 3h to set the place coz' we cldnt get the day before. so
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
princesszhing says maybe SAF ppl get even more priority. *angry* URGH! double standards!! wondering where this place is? sneak preview!
okay...tt's all for part one. am in the midst of getting my door signage done, my cards finalised, decision on my cupcakes, caterer, flowers, chairs, favours (if any), photographer etc. etc. too much to cover la. till next time...have fun catching the F1 race next week peeps. i'll prob be dead tired and catching it while at work =P enjoy the long weekend!
Project Mysterious Letters
So these 2 ppl called Lenka and Michael started their little "art piece" by writing to every single person living in this lil town in Ireland...and they have the intention to write to everybody in the world! and thing is...all these ppl they're writing to, they probably know nuts about them. contents of the letters / postcards? random stuff that i find quite funny actually. click on the link to read some of them =) some of those who got the letters were skeptical about their purpose...i just think they read too much into it. it's a friendly gesture...just accept it and move on!
well, seeing this...it reminded me about how i used to write random notes to my friends during sec sch days. 'cept i wrote to ppl i knew and they're writing to ppl whose names they don't even know. so what happened to hand-written letters? with technology...have we forgotten how sincerity can be shown through simple writing? i'm not saying that sending emails equate lack of sincerity but i'm sure if you received a handwritten letter or card or whatever...the first thought would be "wah piang...got so much to write meh" or "wah seh...so much time to use hand and write". how many of us will think along the lines of "oh my, handwritten! he/she bothers to make that extra effort for me. must cherish."? i know i'm guilty of taking such things for granted, which probably explains why my friends have stopped writing to me =P
maybe it's not their intention to remind us how easy it is to spread love and warmth through writing but when i first saw this project, i wondered what had stopped me from writing. rather than finding this project ridiculous, like how some ppl do, i can't wait to receive my letter from them! *waves* Hi Lenka and Michael, if you do chance upon this while googling for your names, would you please write me a postcard? Hee! oh well, anyway, share your thoughts =)
- Mood:
thoughtful
forget abt Sunway Penang...just know that if u're gg to P-island and u'd like to stay in a nice, better hotel...Sunway's not the place to go. I was quite disappointed but it's an experience and furthermore, i know that completing the feedback forms is a total waste of energy. at least in m'sia. but of coz' if u're a fan of rocky chairs, unattentive service, paying 10ringgit to park at the entrance but always have to wait for somebody to remove barrier and even though u horn like crazy, nobody attends to u...then yeah, maybe u wanna try this place out.
moving on the much more "interesting" stay i had at klang. luckily it was only a one-nighter...but we paid 100+ ringgit and to be honest, i didnt find that a steal at all. Come to think of it...i don't remember the name of the hotel anymore. i think it was called Gold Course? So when we went in asking for the rate, the receptionist replied asking cy for his ic instead of telling us how much it was for a night. but since we cldnt find anywhere else to stay (strangely, all the other hotels were booked) and cy was too tired to continue with driving so...whatever it was, we had to take this room.
and we thought we were lucky.
went up to the rooms and for almost every room, the door looked like this:
then we thought...hey, if there's a proper room number plate, things can't be that bad eh? and then we came to our door and i couldnt help but burst out laughing. it looked like:
after that, i was still quite positive...thinking that hey, maybe renovation and the plate's not ready. and then we opened our room door...
omg!!! this room must be worse than those out a horror story! anw i was convinced that it's haunted and couldnt sleep well the entire night. rawr~ so this 2 double-bed room, came with only one double-bed. had wires hanging out from everywhere...with no connection to an appliance. the wardrobe was spoilt, they had a showerhead smaller than mine at home and no heater...the blankie was useless and when u tried to adjust the room temperature via the worn-out bedside panel, everything blacks out momentarily. i was truly glad when the night was over. like...s.e.r.i.o.u.s.l.y thankful.
that aside, the trip to penang was ok. i think i'm getting used to how it's like whenever we go back. there's barely time for ourselves coz' everybody wants a bit of cy's time. he makes me feel better abt it by saying that everybody wants to hang out with US. i'm like...ya right. anw, good food always makes me happy. This time around, re-tasted some of the specialties and somehow didnt find them as tasty as when i first tried them. cy says my expectations are getting higher and higher each time...which probably explains the disappointment. but the food is still yummy and mostly cheap. I thought the char kway teow was a tad expensive...didnt know it was like 6ringgit for a small plate! i'm talking abt the lor selamat one...for those who know what i'm talking abt. have yet to try the sisters one...coz' it was closed when we went. and i still didnt get to eat char kway kak!!! bah...next time i guess~ whoever tries it before me...let me know if it's good!
- Mood:
cheerful
...is a pot full of depression.
- Mood:
depressed
tear me into pieces if you wanna. i really don't give a damn anymore.
- Mood:
indifferent
know how it feels when u know u're happy in a r/s but everybody else around u just doesnt seem happy for you that u're dating and even intending to marry him? yeah. that's exactly how i'm feeling right now. period.
i dunoe how long it's gg to take ppl to understand. but i'm really tired. think whatever you want. i really don't care anymore.
- Mood: sad
- Mood: gloomy
everytime i face a major "crisis", i have the tendency to seek opinion from my friends, more than my family. it's not that i don't value their views but they can't seem to be supportive of my decisions...and to them, earning less than $2k as a graduate is simply not acceptable. despite explaining time and again abt the whole nature of this industry...nothing seems to change. oh well...the same with the job-thingy recently. in any case, if the company offers, i'm gonna take it. the basic pay's lower than my current check but i'm confident it'll get better. definitely takes time but i'm sure i'll be happier in this new environment. ahh...hope everything goes well. i'm actually quite worried =|
anyway...thank you all...for listening to me go on and on about how miserable i've been. for offering me advice time and time again eventhough i don't heed them. for telling me to be brave, to be confident of myself and to live my dreams. for having faith in my abilities and for being such strong pillars of support. love you all heaps! *hugs*
- Mood:
grateful
anw...so the other girl goes on course and naturally has to hand over her work to the both of us. given this situation, wldn't you...u rational person...task the slacker person with the more troublesome and busy manager? well, obviously...she doesnt think so and once again, i get the BUSY and frigging DIFFICULT manager to assist, despite me having to assist 3 managers (including my boss) and fulfill my duties as department trainer and churn out weekly revenue report which they don't know how to do. and this is not the first time she has done this to me. like wtf! i always try to give her the easier way out while i'm on leave and she does this to me huh? great. and i was thinking of teaching her how to do the revenue report so tt somebody knows what's going on when i quit. FUCKING FORGET IT! i'm NOT going to do it and u go ask whoever to teach u. BURN!
i dunoe if i've vented enough. earlier during lunch, i was just asking Sisterhood if i shld still quit if i didnt get the WA job. i think i've got my answer.
- Mood:
angry
erm, pictures are available at facebook...if you're really keen. hahaha...my lil CNY getaway in cy's hometown - penang. popped by genting on the way back and tried jackpotting for the 1st time. totally addictive but hey, i'm not compulsive gambler so...we walked away with money still left in our pockets =) *phew* ate heaps of yummy food and gained back all the weight i lost initially for my sister's wedding. bahh...time to start the soup lunch diet again.
speaking about time, need to hit the sacks now. after the stupid workplace implemented a 5-day work week...it's like they're not willing to let us off for the weekend, that we have to make up for it by working longer during the weekdays. now i've got to start at 8:45am and only end at 6:30pm. that's like close to 10h daily! wtf. work seriously sucks. zero passion. zero motivation. totally time to say sayonara. hmm...if i don't have to serve at tables this weekend...i'll be at the comp updating my cv.
argh! i can't wait to go! well, till next time peeps...take care all!
golly. how long has it been since i last wrote? anw since my last entry...i've taken a much more aloof attitude towards work. i figured, since nobody appreciates my effort anyway, why should i work so hard? it's against my character but the working world is so cruel...if i kept up with my old style of work, i'd die of exhaustion and still nobody will pity me. yes, it's THAT harsh. at least in my very humble opinion.
okay...only happy things in this entry though =)
argh!!! i missed out doing a collage for the lil Tioman trip i went on with bing and aimei. ahhaha...was a pretty good trip actually, minus the hiccups and disappointment with the lodging part. and the non-swimmer me got to snorkel! erh...maybe 1st and last time. quite scary actually...thankfully i had the girls with me =) in any case...i doubt i'm gg back there again. once in a lifetime's experience there is good enough for me =)
okay...only happy things in this entry though =)
argh!!! i missed out doing a collage for the lil Tioman trip i went on with bing and aimei. ahhaha...was a pretty good trip actually, minus the hiccups and disappointment with the lodging part. and the non-swimmer me got to snorkel! erh...maybe 1st and last time. quite scary actually...thankfully i had the girls with me =) in any case...i doubt i'm gg back there again. once in a lifetime's experience there is good enough for me =)
alrighty! for those not informed, my sis got married this November! to be specific...was 8th. so can totally imagine how hectic my week was. Thank God for dear adeline~ i kept dilly-dallying about buying appropriate clothes for the occasion and then the winter collection came. i totally cldnt find cheery colours!!! oh wells...luckily tt lil trip down to ade's house proved to be fruitful =) anw, see that picture on the upper left-hand corner? that's my favourite pic! heehee...i told my sis, luckily ginger was feeling strangely down, otherwise she would have gobbled up her bouquet. t'was a surprisingly relaxed session...both the lunch and dinner. i think i want mine to be THAT simple as well. no hassel of waking up at 6am in the morning and torturing of groom's buddies etc. hahaha...changed perception to ang-moh style ceremonies. i think martha stewart has converted me.
yes yes. for friends who don't have facebook and i've unintentionally missed out on informing...here's introducing to THE boyfriend. affectionately known as cy amongst my group of friends...erm, i'm lost of words already. hee! but hey! that doesnt mean you guys leave me out on gatherings and other stuff alright? i'll still make a point to turn up for 38 sessions and stuff so...please please please keep me in the loooooop. anw, for further information, gimme a buzz!
mmm...like mentioned in the beginning of the entry...nthg really much on the job front. i'm starting to look out for alternatives that'll make me happier...even if it means a lower pay. may just go take up a floral arrangement course or...apply for an intern job at a wedding planner's? some ideas i'm toying around with. think the desk-bound job is just driving me nuts. wish me luck ppl!!! ok, before i go and i'm sure you'll be reading this when ur internet's working in a bit...
happy first month dar =)
- Mood:
loved - Music:炎亚伦 feat. 刘力扬 - TiAmo
i came across this signboard on my way home from work. left over from yday's Human Race but it aptly described what i need right now. First Aid. where's my injury? my mind.
been flooded by negativity about work since last week. t'was especially evident during my days off...somehow, something must be wrong about the job, if u can't get ur mind off it even when u're on leave. it's.just.so.unhealthy. worse thing is...i'm only an admin. and i would like to reiterate that i'm not the only admin in the office. if some work can be done without me, why wait till i return to have it done? it just doesnt make sense at all. i'm not even paid enough to shoulder this amount of responsibility.
and i'm sick of being a puppet trainer. a trainer who's just not taken seriously, who is just there for the sake of being there and whose performance is judged, based on the results of trainees. even MOE doesnt pay teachers that way. i mean, i'm sure my pay will not be affected with so-and-so getting only 50% for test calls but the thing is, it affects my superior's impression on my ability. it's not like i'm not putting in effort. my efforts are not paying off. if tt's the case, somebody please take over my job. i really don't need that measly allowance to survive and it's not worth all the stress i'm going through. i think the boss should just rotate this role. let everybody have a taste of what it's like to be treated this way by people you think are your comrades at work.
i think i'm going to breakdown again soon. and perhaps this time, i wont be restarting.
- Mood:
tired
it seems that my life is filled with random moments these days...nothing significant to blog about so...just a show-and-tell session...
caught the fireworks display the week after NDP...happened to be working on both Friday and Saturday night. since it was so convenient, no excuse to miss it.
SY bought VN and myself one of those fans...no prizes for guessing which is mine.
did i mention my sis is getting married in Nov? anw this was taken some time in July i think...snapped one before i headed out to work. no no...sarong she's wearing is NOT her gown and NOT any part of her get-up.
alas! i've run out of pics. till next time...
- Mood:random
when the phones kept coming in today...this sudden thought flashed through my mind once again.
why.am.i.working.so.hard?
honestly...am i the only administrator around? why is everybody from every other dept looking for me to get things done for other ppl? and what's worse...why r they calling me for something my dept doesnt cover? it's funny how ppl can call me, looking for a manager in another dept. i'm like...they dont have administrators or what? i'm not God u know...i don't oversee and decide on everything!
seriously, why am i trying so hard to get things done for my manager (no offense, xlb...i'm just sore about how things are), while some other admin gets an easy time coz' her manager is covered for by another manager? and my manager is covered for by me? and who am i? just an admin. so what if i've been around longer? i was never taught tt's the way things work and i've never taught my new colleagues anything different. so why? why did my boss ask me to be the dept trainer and nobody's taking me seriously? and who am i to tell a manager "hey! i've already taken the extra effort to stick tt standard verbiage on your phone. what more do u want me to do so that you'll say that few friggin' lines whenever u pick up ur damn blardy phone?" i'm losing patience. i can't imagine the day where i'll just let go and bitch to my boss abt my predicament. thing is...he's in no better state...so i've been trying to put myself in his shoes (ya right, what do i know about being a DOC...i'm just an admin).
in any case...out of the 1029912746354309694295477503945627371621
perhaps i chose the wrong profession afterall. it's so disheartening that i feel stupid.
[writer's note: wanted to do a happy entry today about my dinner date with princesszhing but the negativity won.]
- Mood: disappointed
anw, the house is undergoing painting works now. the structures are up and all tt's left is the actual works to start. some dude spent the whole entire day washing the walls of my house...imagine the water bill when it comes. i think my mum will flip. other than tt...i'm gonna be painting 2 walls of my new room yellow. think i need the bright colour...am a little off-colour these days. hopefully they'll lift my spirits up again.
so as part of the project...i'm supposed to start moving my property out of the room slowly. but somehow...defiance in me has been delaying progress. and the fact tt i'm working like crazy on weekdays and i've gotta do packing on weekends, not too enticing either. nevertheless, i managed to clear out ONE drawer of stuff. erh, more like move it over to the other room. the sis was doing the same...so we decided to take a look at each other's silly notes and stuff. well, it was more like her showing them to me before throwing most of them out...things from her ex-bf (who passed away during army expedition) and her good friends (who are ALL guys). i really tried to throw mine away...but cldnt bear to do tt. i did, however, dispose of half my collection of received greeting cards (sorry ppl...it's really too large a quantity) and had every intention to dump 2 bags of notes written by gal pals during our sec sch days. but then...i couldn't. so the bags are still sitting in my drawer. and then i thought of The Box. when i saw my sis throwing out her stuff...i was wondering if i shld do the same. then again, they're just memories...so shldnt matter right? i guess i'll just get rid of whatever's beyond use...and lock it up in some unknown lil corner in my drawer.
and this lil episode over the weekend...got me thinking about all these friends i used to write to. i had this pretty good friend in pri sch...whom i used to send greeting cards to every year. i stopped when i went off to switz though...dunoe how he's doing now. ppl i used to send random letters to...i've also stopped doing that altogether. am i becoming less sincere? am i using work as an excuse for my change in attitude towards ppl? or maybe i'm just turning into an indifferent bitch?
for my dear dear friends who wrote to me when i was away in switz...thank you guys...honestly. those letters always brought a smile to my face and esp during that couple of months in leysin, it was really a joy to check my mail slot and receive stuff from familiar names. i'm sure i've said thanks before but i guess whenever i have the time to look through tt drawer full of memories...i'll be reminded of how heartwarming it felt back then. thank you all for sticking by me through it all...at whichever stage of my life. things would have been very different and i don't think it would have gone right without knowing every single one of you. this applies to YOU too. it's a pity how our friendship turned out this way...but i still want to thank you...for being such a dear friend for a good 2 years of my life.
okay. enough meloncholy for the night. have a great week ppl...i think i've already got monday blues.
- Mood: melancholy
today. i walked into the gents.
and the worse thing of it all...it wasn't an immediate realisation.
okay...so it's not the end of the world. but even tripping or slipping is not as embarrassing. rawr! here's what happened.
i, stained my jacket during lunch. wanted to wash it off when i went back to the office but it slipped my mind. so when i went back to class (i was on course)...i caught sight of the stain and decided to go get rid of it while i still remembered. focusing on that only...i left the room and made my way to the washroom. somehow or rather...i missed the sign. well, toilets at the hotel are differentiated by logos, instead of words. and happily, euphie walked into the gents, armed with a napkin. went to the sink, got some water, wiped off whatever stain...and was about to leave when....
a guy walked out of a cubicle.
for a moment, i stared at him and he stared at me. as i was about to say "this is the ladies"...i looked to my left et voila! was greeted by a whole row of sparkling urinals. thank God nobody was using them. right. so to salvage the already ultra-embarrasing situation...instead of leaving without saying anything at all...i said "oops! sorry i entered the gents!" -buries face in hands- no, i didnt stay long enough to share a hearty laughter with the guy.
u think that's the end of it? u're wrong. here's the angsty part.
so during my break later in the afternoon, i went to the LADIES. bumped into my G.M's secretary there and she had this really solemn expression on her face. she came up to me and asked "hey, what happened just now ah?" i was puzzled, so i said "why?" to which her reply was "i saw you walk into the gents". for a moment...i think i felt blood rushing to my face. out of embarrassment or anger, i don't know. maybe both. so i explained what happened...and yeah, tt's it. on normal days, i dun really wanna talk to her more than i need to. anyway...i was angry coz' if she was walking behind me (or so she claimed), why didnt she stop me?! f lor...stupid old spinster bitch. bahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!
lesson learnt: always look up before u enter a room.
right. tt's about all. laugh all u want.
- Mood:
amused
is feeling sad =( and will probably feel this way for quite a while...
-sigh-
- Mood: sad
then after yummy roast duck/roast pork rice for lunch, an SMS came in while i was still slightly moody and instantly made my day =)
i think i'll sleep well tonite =)
- Mood: cheerful
i think i need to handle stress better. but how? maybe i should really start jogging or finding some activity that'll help me let off steam.
i think my friends are a wonderful bunch. they'll never complain that i'm hardly attending gatherings and they've not forsaken me either. at least for now.
i think my parents are getting used to me coming home late, which is kinda sad. when i go home at 8pm, my mum says "wow! so early today!". something is definitely wrong here.
i think i will never get a promotion, if i dun start picking up on selling skills and managerial stuff. but then again, who's gonna give me time to do that?
i think that's it lah. DBSF et moi will just remain as we are. -sigh-
i think if i started off in operations...i may have less problem with this job. but then again, with a CREEP heading that department, it wouldnt make a difference. that, i'm certain.
i think if i continue thinking...nothing will ever change. but as much as i wanna put all these thoughts into action...i can only think about doing that for now.
i think i wanna go sleep. goodnight.
